Thursday, May 31, 2012

5/31/2012: Canvas Shoes (White)

Apparently it's true what they say about fashion, everything cycles around again. I had basically these same canvas shoes back in the 80s. They weren't from Old Navy because I don't think Old Navy existed back then. Now I just need to find a linen pastel blazer to wear with the shoes to complete the look.

Tuesday, May 29, 2012

5/29/2012: A+D Ointment.

As part of the basic care for my new ink (badasses such as myself often say "ink" instead of "tattoo," it's how you know they're badasses now that they're inked) I was instructed to regularly apply A+D Ointment to the area. Yes, the diaper rash stuff. Which is fine, keeps it from drying out and helps it heal faster. There's only two problems. First, this stuff must be delicious because as soon as apply it to the area of the tattoo the dog follows me around trying to lick it off my calf. And second, it makes my leg smell like a baby's butt after a diaper change. 


Monday, May 28, 2012

5/28/2012: Bike Rack

Today I'd planned on going on a bike ride. Downloaded an app for my phone that measures distance and speed and such I was going to try out. As far as I got was to get my bike rack out of the basement (where it was stored for the winter) and reattach it to the spare tire on the back of my Jeep. Then I decided it was hot. But it's a start. Not much of a start, but a start.

See also: Jeep 

Sunday, May 27, 2012

5/27/2012: Hardcover Copy of The Hitchhiker's Guide To the Galaxy

Figured I might as well keep the weekend's Douglas Adams theme going with the book that started it all, my hardcover copy of The Hitchhiker's Guide To the Galaxy. Though technically what started it all for me was the original radio broadcast album, which my aunt was playing when we stopped over for a visit one evening long ago. It was the part where the whale and the bowl of petunias are called into existence above the planet Magrathea and we here the whale's inner monologue as he plunges to his death on the planet's surface far below. Funny stuff, huh? I was probably 13 or so at the time, and picked up the book a few years later. Picked it up again this afternoon.

See Also: Tattoo, Don't Panic Towel

Saturday, May 26, 2012

5/26/2102: Tattoo

Yesterday I finally did it, finally got my tattoo. Right leg on the side of my calf. I'd talked about getting one for a very long time, and it's always been this, which is an illustration from the cover of my favorite book, The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy. I wanted something that was meaningful and would be meaningful long after I permanently scarred myself, not just something I liked now. And that book was hugely influential for me, it helped form my views and opinions on everything from politics and religion to British people and fjords.

(A sidenote to those people who got tattoos from the Harry Potter movies or, worse, Twilight: you're idiots. You love them now but in 10 years? I doubt it.)

See also: Don't Panic towel

Friday, May 25, 2012

5/25/2012: Don't Panic Towel

I received this Don't Panic towel as a gift, but not for my 42nd birthday (believe it or not). I wanted to post it today because May 25th is, as everyone knows, Towel Day. Why a day dedicated to towels? Well, as author Douglas Adams wrote in the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, a towel is just about the most massively useful thing found in the universe.

A towel is about the most massively useful thing an interstellar hitchhiker can have. Partly it has great practical value. You can wrap it around you for warmth as you bound across the cold moons of Jaglan Beta; you can lie on it on the brilliant marble-sanded beaches of Santraginus V, inhaling the heady sea vapors; you can sleep under it beneath the stars which shine so redly on the desert world of Kakrafoon; use it to sail a miniraft down the slow heavy River Moth; wet it for use in hand-to-hand-combat; wrap it round your head to ward off noxious fumes or avoid the gaze of the Ravenous Bugblatter Beast of Traal (such a mind-boggingly stupid animal, it assumes that if you can’t see it, it can’t see you); you can wave your towel in emergencies as a distress signal, and of course dry yourself off with it if it still seems to be clean enough.

More importantly, a towel has immense psychological value. For some reason, if a strag (strag: nonhitchhiker) discovers that a hitchhiker has his towel with him, he will automatically assume that he is also in possession of a toothbrush, washcloth, soap, tin of biscuits, flask, compass, map, ball of string, gnat spray, wet-weather gear, space suit etc., etc. Furthermore, the strag will then happily lend the hitchhiker any of these or a dozen other items that the hitchhiker might accidentally have “lost”. What the strag will think is that any man who can hitch the length and breadth of the galaxy, rough it, slum it, struggle against terrible odds, win through, and still knows where his towel is, is clearly a man to be reckoned with.

Thursday, May 24, 2012

5/24/2012: Shredder

I finally decided to pull out the shredder and tackle the mound of junk mail credit card solicitations I've collected over the last year or so. Honestly I'd like to just stop receiving mail all together, is that possible?Of course, then what would I do with the shredder? Maybe use it to shred lettuce for tacos?

Wednesday, May 23, 2012

5/23/2012: Laundry Needing To Be Folded

This basket full of laundry needing to be folded has become an almost permanent fixture in the living room for several weeks now. Yes, it's been there, waiting to be folded, for weeks. The level will go down as I grab something out of it to wear. Then back up when I do more laundry and pile it on top. Clearly I just hate folding laundry.

Or I'm just THAT lazy. Yeah, that seems more likely.

See Also: Chair

Tuesday, May 22, 2012

5/22/2012: Green Hose

Picked up this green hose at Ace Hardware over the weekend. I planted some window boxes and pots at the front of my house and this year I've decided to try and keep my plants from dying. Which means I have to actually water them. To make that easier, I'm just leaving this coiled hose attached on the side of the house. The window well serves as convenient storage.

See also: Red Hose

Monday, May 21, 2012

5/21/2012: Red Hose

I use this red hose to water the vegetable garden in the back yard. It's coiled so it it doesn't need to be wound up when I'm done using it, shrinks back on its own. The nozzle needs to be replaced, has a crack in the side so squirts out water the wrong way. I guess leaving it sitting on the window sill outside all winter wasn't a good idea...

See also: Green Hose

Sunday, May 20, 2012

5/20/2012: Green Table Cloth

Due to the lighting from the dining room windows, this green table cloth ends up serving as a backdrop of a lot of my stuff. Especially if I'm taking a pic later in the day.

Saturday, May 19, 2012

5/19/2012: Cartman Mouse Pad

I've had this Cartman mouse pad for a very very long time. Well over a decade now. The foam is desiccated and crumbling around the edges and I shudder to think how filthy the thing is. I'd wash it but I'm pretty sure that would destroy it. When a plague eventually does sweep the earth bringing about a zombie apocalypse, chances are it will be from a super germ or virus that grew on this mouse pad.

See Also: TV Shows; Samsung Computer Monitor

Wednesday, May 16, 2012

5/16/2012: Pizza Cutter

I assume in every kitchen it's the same: the second drawer down is home to a random assortment of specialized kitchen gadgets such as pizza cutters, melon ballers or egg slicers.

See Also: Gadgets, Egg Slicer

Tuesday, May 15, 2012

5/15/2012: Hammer

My older-younger brother is the handy one in the family and often I call on him to assist me with a project or repair. (It's OK though - I got the brains, looks, personality and sense of humor.) He's constantly making fun of my tools and the quality (or lack thereof) of my random assortment of tools purchased piece meal as needed from Target. No, I don't have a fancy Ryobi drill in a nice Ryobi bag with all the special Ryobi drill bits. I have cheaper stuff. Like this hammer. When I pound it into a nail, the nail goes into a piece of wood so clearly it works well enough. And if I ever need something better? Well I've got a brother for that.

Monday, May 14, 2012

5/14/2012: Shed

Painting the shed in my backyard was one of the first home improvement type projects I did. Previously it was all one rather ugly shade of red. I painted it a brighter red, did the trim in white, giving it a barn look. Came out pretty well... at least from a distance.

5/13/2012:Trowel

Saturday, May 12, 2012

5/12/2012: Window Boxes (before)

Hopefully these window boxes will go from laying on the floor of my garage to being hung on my house this weekend. "After" pics to follow.

Friday, May 11, 2012

5/11/2012: Pillow

Shopping for decorative pillows for the couch is, I've come to find out, one of my least favorite things to do. Mainly because I think they're stupidly expensive for what they are. Which is why when I saw a pair of these on clearance at Target ($9 for a pair! Which is still more than they should be but... whatever...) I grabbed them.

See also: Second Couch

Monday, May 7, 2012

5/7/2012: Toe Nail Clippers

Rather than only using my toe nail clippers to clip my toe nails (as opposed to using them to, say, rotate the tires on my Jeep) I should probably go and get a pedicure. But Queer Eye For the Straight Guy has been off the air for years now and the impetus and social acceptability of a dude to do so is gone with it. Except for the fact I have very ugly toe nails that could use the attention of a professional. Especially with mandal season upon us.

See also: New Mandals

Sunday, May 6, 2012

5/6/2012: Cable Splicing Kit

Yesterday, while trimming my wildly overgrown hedges along the side of the house into a neater boxier shape, I was thinking to myself "OK, I better be careful I'm getting close to the ca-" and *BZZZZT* the electric trimmers cut right through the cable before I could finish thinking "-ble." 

So I did what any home owner would do when faced with such a situation... I went to my brother's bar an had a beer. After which I went to Menard's and purchased this cable splicing kit.

See also: Hedge Trimmers

Saturday, May 5, 2012

5/5/2012: Hedge Trimmers

So I'm trimming the hedges, dog barking at me (well, at the hedge trimmers) and I'm thinking to myself "OK, better be careful I'm getting close to the ca..." and before I can finish the word with the "-ble" the trimmers cut right through the it. Oops. Could only laugh at myself. And then the panic set in. No TV?!?! NO INTERNET??!?!?! Time for an Amish Saturday night.

See Also: Things the dog hates; cable splicing kit

Friday, May 4, 2012

5/4/2012: Wooden Crab

This wooden crab is the carved animal companion piece to a wooden turtle I posted in the early days of this blog. They were a couple of my favorite things my grandmother had in her house. It was a memento from a vacation she and my grandfather had taken to Jamaica (I think) long before I was born. It's an item that I'll always associate with my grandmother, full of the nostalgia of youthful visits to New Jersey, which is why it was one of the things I wanted after she passed away. The crab's shell lifts up to reveal a small compartment. I suppose you keep your weed in there? It IS from Jamaica after all. Don;t worry, my grandmother would find me saying that funny. We used to watch Benny Hill reruns together when I was 8 so she had a sense of humor.

See also: Wooden Crab; Irises

Tuesday, May 1, 2012

5/1/2012: Small Wooden Donkey

This small wooden donkey clearly demonstrates one thing: I need to dust my shelves.

See also: World Crap